PI Thaddeus and Cresta Lyn's Wedding

PI and Tata, let me tell you today how I made my homily for your wedding; it was with difficulty. Why? Well, this is my first time to deliver a wedding homily for my very own nephew -the son of my brother. I have already written three books about marriages and wedding. I have also delivered many wedding homilies. I have done what I have to do as a priest to preserve the sanctity of marriage. But today is different, I am not just speaking as a priest but above all as an uncle to you PI and Tata.  So, how shall I deliver my wedding homily today? With pleasure.  

PI and Tata, most couples who passionately love each other dream of a great wedding. But a great wedding is subjective. A wedding may be great to both of you but it may not be so to other couples. Be that as it may, a great wedding simply means a celebration of love between a man and a woman. Without love, the  wedding may still be in the public eye, it may run viral, it may go trending and the couple may become briefly famous, yet what will happen to their married life after it (the wedding)?

PI and Tata, history tells us there were great weddings but they never ended great due to the absence of love. Among those was the wedding of the century, the wedding between Prince Charles and the late Princess Diana which took place in 1981 and was watched by millions of people on television. But in 1992, they announced their separation. Then there was this celebrity wedding, the wedding between Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston who seemed to be a perfect couple. In year 2000, Brad Pitt and Aniston had their great wedding with classy decorations at their wedding venue, with multiple bands and fireworks galore. In 2005, they ended their marriage in divorce. I tell these to you PI and Tata, so that you should know that love matters to throw the best wedding ever. No matter how much you spend on this wedding, without love, it cannot guarantee a happy marriage.  

PI and Tata, I know you love each other. Tata, I remember the first time PI introduced you to me as his friend. I know he is not a good liar because the truth is -you are the only person, the only woman whom he has allowed to enter their home. Since birth, PI had never been with a woman except for his mother and sister. I know you are special to him. You are special to him because you make him feel loved. 

I remember when you PI got sick, it was discovered that you have had a heart problem. Your uncle Boyet and uncle Randy immediately advised you to see Dr. Jessore Ibabao Isidro because he is the best doctor who can help you with your medical condition. Then came my advice; I told you to look for someone to love and be loved. Right there and then, you brought Tata into your family home. Tata patiently took care of you until you finally met Dr. Isidro. PI, your doctor gives you a healthy heart while Tata gives you a loving heart.  

PI and Tata, I know you love each other that is why you have this great wedding. You both have the P-assion, I-ntimacy and T-rust. You also are C-ommitted and L-oving to each other. But PI and Tata, how shall this great wedding end? What is next after #PInally got Cresta?  

Obviously, your flowers and wedding bouquet wither, your wedding dress is kept, your printed wedding invitations go straight to the trash, no more leftover food and drinks to take home, your guests go home, you make your wedding announced officially in Facebook letting the world know you are "Married" and then  have your honeymoon. Of course, after the wedding, you open all of your cards and wedding presents and finally look at your wedding pictures and post them in Facebook as a sequel to your prenuptial photos. But I tell you PI and Tata, sooner or later, you will realize you barely remember the details of this wedding. Like what some married couples experienced with their wedding, your wedding day goes by in flash and the details of which are blurry. This is why you have your prenuptial photos and wedding pictures -to capture the day you celebrate love. Yet, even with those photos which remind you of how you celebrate love, you will struggle to keep your love alive. 

Once the passion to celebrate love runs out, there is a risk to fall out of love. Such was the experience of the unnamed couple during their wedding at Cana. The Gospel of John 2: 1-12 tells us that during the wedding, the wine ran out. Interpreted allegorically, "the wine runs out" connotes a lack of joy or that the passion to celebrate love runs out. Thanks to Jesus through the intercession of Mama Mary, a miracle happened that the best wine was served to save the couple on their wedding day from embarrassment. 

PI and Tata, I ask you then, "What shall you do when the wine will run out?" When there is no more passion to celebrate love, will you run away Tata and await for PI to get you back into his arms to suit the theme, PI finally got Cresta? Will you turn your back PI on Tata to let her feel that nobody has got her back? I hope not. I rather ask you to go to the Church together and pray incessantly to celebrate love.  

PI and Tata, I have counseled many couples with various kinds of marital problems and I have to be honest to tell you this -when marriage is at its worst, only prayer can bring the best out of which. Most married couples in difficult situations and strained relations only need prayers. It is true, prayer is more effective than any advice.  

PI and Tata, when you pray together and ask for the intercession of Mama Mary and for the presence of Jesus Christ in your married life, there will be miracles in your marriage like what Jesus did during the wedding at Cana. Thus, PI and Tata, pray incessantly to celebrate love. So that you will not forget this, remember the first letters of your names PIT-CL -Pray Incessantly To Celebrate Love.  

And as I end my homily, let me pray this to you PI and Tata, "The Lord bless you and keep you; The Lord make His face shine upon you, And be gracious to you; The Lord lift up His countenance upon you, And give you peace." (Numbers 6: 24-26) 

PI and Tata, have a happy married life. Amen.

Eliana and Boom's Wedding

Today is a very extra-ordinary day to celebrate love in a wedding. I say this because December 12, 2012 or 12-12-12 happens only once in our lifetime. In addition, number 12 is rich with significance like there are 12 animals in a chinese calendar, 12 zodiac signs, 12 tribesof Israel, 12 disciples of Jesus, 12 months in a year, 12 hours for A.M. and another 12 hours for P.M. to  make a one whole day. 

My dear Eliana and Boom, as you celebrate your love today, you also want to convey to the world that your wedding is an extra-ordinary event or occasion.  But how do you make your wedding an extra-ordinary one aside from the date 12-12-12 which happens only once in our lifetime? Well, Eliana and Boom, you have an extra-ordinary story of love and relationship. Boom, you have met many women but you have chosen Eliana to be your partner. Eliana, you also have met many men, but you have chosen Boom to be your beloved. Aside from this fact, a teacher helped you to build love in your relationship, which means she chose both of you to be together. She trusted both of you that you can make a difference in the field of love. Eliana and Boom, trust also yourselves that you can make a difference.

In many cases of marital break-ups or troubled marriages, couples forget to make a difference in their lives. After their wedding, their interest for each other fades as they see their marital life monotonous and ordinary. They wake up, they have their breakfast, they go to work, they come home and everything is just customary, everything is part of an ordinary routine including their kiss. But for you Eliana and Boom, try to make a difference each day. When you are happy, praise God. When you encounter problems in life or you are in a conflicting situation, hold each other's hands and face everything as a partner. See each other as a solution to any problem and not as a problem to be solved. Then pray to God. By these, you can make a difference.

But  remember also that to make a difference is not easy. We are human beings and being human, we have limitations. Eliana and Boom, there are times that you reach your limits especially in expressing your love. You get tired, bored,doubtful, etc. and you do not feel that passion to love each other. When this happens to you, please be patient to each other. When you find yourselves quarreling, shouting, screaming or crying, please see to it that after the quarreling, shouting, screaming or crying, you do not forget how your love begins. End the day by recalling the happy moments you have had as partners. Make it your daily habit to spend your day with a happy ending.

To end my homily, Eliana and Boom your wedding has no magic to make you happy. Rather it is both of you who can make this wedding a happy event or occasion when you are happy being together. You can notice that your family and friends are at the back. Yes they love you. They can give you some advice on how to make your marriage a happy marriage. But the secret of a happy marriage is not so much about the strategies or techniques (most marriage counselors are also separated) they give. You can build a happy marriage when both of you remain in the love of God. Be focused on God who is the source of love. He said, "If you keep my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have kept my Father's commands and remain in his love" (John 15:10). Eliana and Boom, if God is with you, your marriage shall remain extra-ordinary as it is only in Him that you can love with an unconditional love. Thus, pray to God, stay in love. Amen.

Lovely and Gliford's Wedding

Lovely and Gliford, long have you lived your life by simply existing. But you know and feel deep inside you, you do not just live for the sake of living. You know that life is more worth living when there is happiness.  This is the reason why every time something bad happens in your life, initially you react negatively, yet you bounce back over time. You believe that life must go on. You believe there is happiness and that happiness comes in God's time. Then one day, it happens that God leads you to each  other. It happens that you realize the time you spend for each other is a moment of happiness. So here you are now. You are happy to be together that is why you decide to get married.

But take note, Lovely and Gliford,  it does not always mean that when both of you are happy, you will also have a happy marriage. There is a distinction between personal happiness and marital happiness. Lovely, I am sure you are happy as a lawyer and you are happier to be with Gliford, a nurse, and soon to be a doctor. Gliford, I am sure you are happy too as a nurse and you are happier to marry Lovely, a lawyer. This is your personal happiness. This personal happiness of yours may affect your marital relationship positively. Positively, in the sense that with your job, you can secure a better future. With your combined work force, what else would you ask from you partner in marriage? You have money, property and industry. You have all the reasons to feel fulfilled and live a life of happiness. You have a very ideal wedding as both of you enter into this with emotional maturity and financial stability.

However, you should be aware that your personal happiness may affect your marriage negatively. Sometimes, your work demands from you most of your time. You have to respond to a call beyond your duty. This means that at some point in your life, you have to sacrifice your marriage for a greater cause i.e., service to mankind. Gliford, I personally know Lovely being my classmate in the College of Law. She often forgets herself just to serve and help those who are in need. In this sense, your marriage is not one without a struggle.

But Lovely and Gliford, this does not mean there is no happy marriage for you. There is a happy marriage as long as both of you never give up despite the struggle. A happy marriage is your reason why every time something bad happens in your married life, you must bounce back over time. Believe that married life must go on. Believe there is a marital happiness and that happiness in marriage comes from God. As you struggle to get hold of happiness in your marriage, and you find yourselves beset by your weaknesses and imperfections, just let God be your guide.

Lovely, remember when Gliford extended a friend request to you on your Facebook account, you could have ignored or deleted his name in your list like what you have done to others. But God is good. God has guided you to give a special attention to Gliford's name.  Gliford, if Lovely had not accepted your friend request, you could have go on with your life without her. You do not just waste your time with people who make you feel unimportant. But God is good. God has guided you to express your particular interest to Lovely. Lovely and Gliford, nothing happens by chance. Everything about the two of you happens because God has guided you.

If you think that Dr. Porferio G. Bullo has guided you to know each other, well, believe that it is God who has guided Dr. Bullo to make all these happen. It is God who has guided you to celebrate this wedding! Therefore, remain in Him; for in Him alone your happiness is made complete. Jesus Christ confirmed this when He said, "Ask and you will receive it, so that your joy may be complete" (John 16: 24).

Moreover, Lovely and Gliford, a happy marriage is not made by chances. Rather, it is a gift from God. Yours then is a happy marriage as you believe that God has lead you to each other and to no other. Believe also that what God has joined together, no one can put asunder (Mark 10:9). Just like the marriage of St. Joseph and Mary, your marriage is in accordance with the will of God. Gliford, you are from Banga, Aklan and the patron saint of your place is St. Joseph, the Spouse of the Blessed Virgin Mary. St. Joseph was married to Mary, the Immaculate Conception, the patron saint of Batan, Aklan where Lovely comes from. I say this again, just like St. Joseph and Mary's marriage is according to the will of God, yours too is according to the will of God. As your marriage is in accordance with the will of God, yours will be a happy marriage. So be happy together. Amen.

9th Day of Simbang Gabi 2019

There is a story of a farmer who used an old horse to till his fields.

One day, the horse escaped into the hills. When the farmer’s neighbors sympathized with the old man over his bad luck, the farmer replied, “Bad luck? Good luck? Who knows?

A week later, the horse returned with a herd of horses from the hills. This time the neighbors congratulated the farmer on his good luck. His reply was “Good luck? Bad luck? Who knows?

Then when the farmer’s son was attempting to tame one of the wild horses, he fell off its back and broke his leg. Everyone thought this was very bad luck. The farmer’s reaction: “Bad luck? Good luck? Who knows?”

Some weeks later, the army marched into the village and conscripted every able-bodied youth they found there. When they saw the farmer’s son with his broken leg, they let him off. Was that Good luck or Bad luck? Who knows!

My dear friends, bad things do happen to good people and at times we cannot understand why it should happen to us. Even those who achieved the highest educational attainment in this world cannot provide us the answer. If ever we get an answer, it will all be attributed to something that goes beyond the physical realm like –it is written in the stars, it is destiny or fate, or it is the will of the gods. But when people do not believe in the supernatural, they just say –who knows if it is bad luck or good luck?

Zechariah, the main actor in our Gospel (Luke 1: 67-79), was not alien to bad experiences, to failure, pain and frustration. He submerged himself in the negative weight of luck not knowing that what he considered bad luck would later turn into a blessing in disguise. He was old and had no children with his wife Elizabeth. It was big deal in those days to have children. In their culture, the family line ended when couples were found childless. They too considered that it was a blessing to have many children while it was a shameful thing to have no child at all. So Zechariah felt he was doomed as he would die childless. But it turned out that everything was a blessing in disguise. In his old age, God gave him a son to be named John. He was given a son who was not just an ordinary person but a precursor of Jesus. His only son John would play a vital role in preparing the way of the Lord. Thus, in our Gospel, we could feel how happy Zechariah was for having a son destined to greatness. Even Jesus Himself said something good about John, “I tell you, among those born of women there is no one greater than John” (Luke 7:28).

My dear friends, our Gospel reminds us to stay calm and refuse to become devastated when things seem to fall apart or when everything seems to bring us bad luck. We have to trust God and believe He knows what is best for us. We have handled crises before and there has always been this assurance that there is no such thing as bad luck because in God, everything is a blessing in disguise. Amen.

8th Day of Simbang Gabi 2019

A young boy aged 9 lived with his father, mother and his 85-year-old grandfather. The grandfather, in his old age, had poor eyesight and was also rather feeble at his limbs. As such, porcelain bowls often slipped from his wrinkled hands when he was eating, much to the annoyance of his son and daughter-in-law.

On this day when the young boy was playing in the backyard of the big mansion they were staying in, his grandfather accidentally broke another porcelain bowl yet again, just a few feet away from where the boy was playing. Hearing the breaking sound of the bowl, the boy’s mother and father came rushing out of their room and stated chiding the grandfather on how clumsy and troublesome he was.

Deciding that he had had enough, the boy’s father commented to the boy’s mother, “Don’t worry. I know that all these bowl-breaking by the old man will never end so yesterday I told our butler to make a bowl out of the coconut husks found in our backyard.” With that, the boy’s father disappeared for a few moments before reappearing with a brown coarse-looking bowl carved out of an old coconut husk. He gave it to the old man who took over the coconut bowl silently.

It was at this moment when the parents heard a soft but clear grinding sound behind them. They turned around and saw that their 9-year-old son was playing with a metal spoon and a coconut husk. Unsure of what their son was doing, the father proceeded to ask his son, “Son, what are you doing with a spoon and the coconut husk?’ The boy looked up and with his gentle eyes and innocent voice, he replied to his father, “Oh I saw how papa gave grandpa the coconut bowl. I thought papa may also need this bowl in future when you are old. So I am making the bowl in advance for you.”

Children are gifts from God. They are born innocent and pure. But when they grow old, some of them remain good, others change for the better while still others for the worse. Yet, the problem in attitude lies not only when children grow old, but even at their young age, children nowadays talk about sex, pornographic movies on cable television, drugs, etc. Young as they are, they are already worldly. We may say that children have lost their innocence. They have lost their true identity as gifts from God. Why? This is so as there is a change in values among parents when it comes to parenting. Parents allow their children to be exposed early to the adult world thinking that it is better for them to learn early from adult experiences. What parents fail to foresee is that their children miss their age of protection.

Our Gospel (Luke 1: 57-66) tells us that when John was born, he was exposed to the adult world where their neighbors and kinsfolk were very involved at his birth. Thanks to his parents because they protected John by insisting that his name should be John despite the protest of the people. They said, “None of your kindred is called by this name.” The act of his parents to give the child the name John reminds all parents that young children should be given love and protection. They should show love to their children as love is the highest form of communication between parents and children. They have to give protection to children because the latter cannot yet protect themselves. In protecting them, they should protect them not only from physical threats but also from that which could rob them of their childhood. Parents should treat their children as a child. They should let their children play with them and be who they are in their presence. They should allow their children to confide in them and give them a hug. All these may be understood by parents if they read Proverbs 22: 6 stating, “Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.”

May all parents then today learn from Zechariah and Elizabeth to love and protect their children. Amen.

7th Day of Simbang Gabi 2019

A famous actor often referred to a special day in his childhood when his father took him fishing. The day was fixed in his mind, and he often reflected upon many things his father had taught him in the course of their fishing experience together. After having heard of that particular excursion so often, it occurred to his cousin much later to check the diary that the actor’s father kept and determine what had been said about the fishing trip from the parental perspective. Turning to that date, the reader found only one sentence entered: “Gone fishing today with my son; A DAY WASTED.”

Being a father is different from being a mother. A father has a different approach to raise children than a mother does. A child learns from his father without his father knowing it. A father influences his child without him realizing it. He/she learns about what a man is from his/her father. He/she may either want to be like his/her father or to be his exact opposite.

In our Gospel (Matthew 1: 18-25), Joseph was told by an angel in his dream to take Mary as his wife and to father God’s only Son –Jesus. Although God could take care of His Son with all His power, He still chose Joseph to play the role of a foster father of Jesus. Why? Joseph was obedient to God. Jesus could learn from him through his example. As any child looks to his/her father to lay down the rules and enforce them, the former learns what it means to obey. But he/she sincerely learns to obey only when he/she sees his/her father as his/her model or idol. If not, then he/she obeys only because of fear.

Jesus, like His human father Joseph, grew up obeying His Father God. Philippians 2: 6-11 states, “Though he was in the form of God, Jesus did not count equality with God, a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself, taking the form of a slave, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form he humbled himself and became obedient unto death.” Joseph, though human as he was, never failed God to be the father of Jesus as he passed on to Him what it takes to obey God.

We pray then that all fathers teach their children how to obey God by giving them examples. We pray then that all fathers find Joseph as their model in parenting their children. Amen.

6th Day of Simbang Gabi 2019

Devina Nund wrote this beautiful story about mothers:

When God created woman, he was working late on the 6th day...

An angel came by and asked, “Why spend so much time on her?” The lord answered, “Have you seen all the specifications I have to meet to shape her?”

“She must function in all kinds of situations, she must be able to embrace several kids at the same time, have a hug that can heal anything from a bruised knee to a broken heart.

She must do all this with only two hands, she cures herself when sick and can work 18 hours a day.”

The Angel was impressed. “Just two hands...impossible! And this is the standard model?” The Angel came closer and touched the woman.

“But you have made her so soft, Lord.”

“She is soft,” said the Lord, “But I have made her strong. You can't imagine what she can endure and overcome.”

"Can she think?” The Angel asked...The Lord answered, "Not only can she think, she can reason and negotiate."

The Angel touched her cheeks..."Lord, it seems this creation is leaking! You have put too many burdens on her."

"She is not leaking...it is a tear," The Lord corrected the Angel...

"What's it for?" Asked the Angel...The Lord said, "Tears are her way of expressing her grief, her doubts, her love, her loneliness, her suffering and her pride."...

This made a big impression on the Angel, "Lord, you are a genius. You thought of everything.

A woman is indeed marvellous"

Lord said, "Indeed she is. She has strength that amazes a man. She can handle trouble and carry heavy burdens. She holds happiness, love and opinions. She smiles when she feels like screaming. She sings when she feels like crying, cries when happy and laughs when afraid. She fights for what she believes in.

Her love is unconditional. Her heart is broken when a next-of-kin or a friend dies but she finds strength to get on with life."

The Angel asked, "So she is a perfect being?"

The lord replied: "No. She has just one drawback, she often forgets what she is worth."

My dear friends, this story reminds us of the meaning of being a mother. A mother is selfless –one who sacrifices her wants, needs and ambitions as long as the wants, needs and ambitions of her children are fulfilled and satisfied. Her reward is being a mother herself. It is not the medal or certificates that can make her happy but the arms of her children who hug or embrace her.

Hear and see the experience of two mothers in our Gospel (Luke 1: 39-45). Mary and Elizabeth were both happy because they were now ready to be called mothers. They rejoiced because of the baby in their womb. How fulfilling it was for them to become mothers. All they did was to talk about their baby. This is the true meaning of being a mother –selfless. Why? Everybody can notice that she changes her name when she gets married. She leaves her own home and moves in a home with her husband. She gets pregnant which changes her body and risks her own life in the labor room. After she delivers her baby, she knows it comes from her yet it does not bear her surname. Everything she does from the birth of her child until the child grows mature is for the benefit of the said child and sometimes she does this at the expense of her needs and ambitions.

Today, we continue to pray for all our mothers. We thank God for creating mothers because it is never easy to be one. During this Simbang Gabi, we resolve before the altar of the Lord to understand and respect our mothers. We give them thanks for the priceless gift of motherhood God has blessed us. Amen.