Marital union is a
two-way process. An expressive interest in each other’s feelings at a time it
is needed by the other can go a long way in deepening the marital relationship.
Marriage is definitely not for children but for two consenting adults who view
the relationship with love amor gignit
amorem, respect, sacrifice and a continuing commitment to compromise,
conscious of its value as a sublime social institution. (Chi Ming Tsoi vs.
Court of Appeals and Gina Lao-Tsoi, GR No. 119190, 16 January 1997)
This quote seems to
suggest that there are two features which are considered important to forge a
beautiful marriage. One is somewhat personal and then the other, legal.
For the first one, the personal
aspect pertains to the feeling that the two have for each other. Both should
feel they need each other and at the same time they feel needed by the other.
This feeling is known to us as love. Love makes one interested about the other.
Without love, a man and a woman lack foundation to build a personal
relationship with each other. Without love, there is no willingness to give
one’s life for the other. Without love, there is no willingness to accept one’s
life given for the sake of the other. Love is the most basic reason why we see
a man and a woman marry.
For the legal aspect,
age and maturity become a considerable circumstance. Marriage is for two
consenting adults, man and woman, who establish a permanent union of conjugal
and family life. The permanence of the union between a husband and his wife is
protected by our law being a sublime social institution. But the law itself
requires that both the husband and wife must know their rights and obligations so
as to observe them. In other words, the law protects the marriage of a husband
and wife who protect it.
Laurence “Niño” and
Jarrie, I believe the two features required to forge a beautiful marriage are
already upon your power. In terms of personal aspect, the love that is asked
from you is already there. Remember, it was sometime in December of 2014, Laurence
“Niño” was diagnosed with Dengue and was confined in a hospital. His platelet
count went as low as 21 and only the doctor could tell if Laurence “Niño” would
already need blood transfusion. The twist of this event happened when Jarrie
decided to stay during the Christmas season to take care of Laurence “Niño” at
the hospital rather than to go home here in Iloilo. Jarrie stayed beside Laurence
“Niño” and even forced him to drink “tawa-tawa” that helped him fully recovered
his health. Laurence “Niño” and Jarrie, this event in your life unfolds the love
which is demanded from you.
In terms of the legal
aspect, again it was in December but this time of 2015 that Laurence “Niño”
decided to take Jarrie as his wife. Laurence “Niño” with a bended knee asked
Jarrie to marry him as the countdown for the New Year started. What happened on
that New Year’s Eve eventually brings us all here today. Laurence “Niño” and
Jarrie, you sealed your love today and you want your love to be protected by
law –law of the State and law of the Catholic Church. It seems that after this
mass, you have all what is being required to forge a beautiful marriage. There
is no reason for you then to doubt the future of your marriage.
Laurence “Niño” and
Jarrie, aside from these two aspects, personal and legal, let me add another aspect
which the Church considers important for every marriage i.e., the spiritual
aspect of marriage. Learn from your experience that even how much you love each
other, other feelings such as anger, jealousy, pride, etc. still do exist
somewhere in your heart. Learn from your experience that even if you are
legally and sacramentally married to each other, you still have your own share
of up’s and down’s, you still have something to argue. Sometimes, if little sentiment
is left unresolved, it becomes determinative for the worsening condition of a
marital relationship. Then the hash tag, JARneytoLAU, is nothing but an
isolated journey of an individual to reach out for another individual. This is
not the marriage you want I believe, Laurence “Niño” and Jarrie. The marriage
that you want is to find yourselves joining each other’s hands journeying
together to a direction God has given you. Marriage, for you Laurence “Niño”
and Jarrie is a lifetime partnership and this can only be real and true when
God is with you. So please, both of you pray together. Prayers will always keep
your marriage safe. As it happens that you marry here in this famous Our Mother
of Perpetual Help Parish in Iloilo, pray to Mama Mary to always help you. Have
faith and pray every day!
To end, Jarrie, I have
known Laurence “Niño” since 2005 when I was assigned as a guest priest in their
parish. I assure you, he is a very responsible loving young man as well as a
very straight guy. I have never seen him happier until he has found you. I say
this because I remember the moment, it was sometime in 2015, when his family
introduced you to me at their home while we were having dinner, I could see how
Laurence “Niño” felt so complete because of you. Jarrie, Laurence “Niño” loves
you with the only love he has reserved for a woman he dreams to marry, be
always thankful for that.
Laurence “Niño”, though
I have only met Jarrie once or twice at your parents’ home, I know she is your
missing link. Like a typical Ilongga, she knows how to take care of the people
you love. She knows when she has to speak her mind or to be silent. She will do
everything she thinks right to support you. Ilonggas are “malambing’ but they
are strong when it comes to issues affecting marriage and family. You are
therefore blessed by God Laurence “Niño” for having Jarrie as your wife. Basta
Ilongga, manami guid magpalangga.
So for both of you,
Laurence “Niño” and Jarrie, your journey towards each other ends in this
wedding but your journey together towards a meaningful lifetime partnership
begins in this marriage. You are no longer two but one. You remain one as long
as you can spell the word JARLAU in your marriage. Just Another Reminder
Love Always Understands. Jarrie and Laurence, let us bless
God and give Him thanks. Amen.
3 comments:
Congrats, Nino and best wishes, Jarri! God bless your marriage
Beautiful homily Fr.Jude. well articulated for some couple you know so well as loving. Sana ganito din kaganda homily mo sa akin ha. Be ready as it will be soon. Hahaha :) #ikawna
haha sure po kaso alam ko mga 15th homily ang homily ko kasi ang dami kaya ang maghohomily sa kasal mo
Hi Fr. Jude!
Just wanted to say thank you again for coming to our wedding and for your homily! It was well written and our family, relatives and friends loved it. See again soon!
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